In Memorium: Barbara Seaman

A beautiful remembrance of a beautiful person, by Jennifer Baumgardner. Barbara's loss will be deeply, deeply felt.

Paging Women's Leadership Gurus!

Following on the heels of oppression olympics comes a spin with far more freshness--and potential gender bendery? I'm talking, of course, about the way that Obama is now being tongue-in-cheek referred to as a female candidate for president in the same way that Bill Clinton was talked about as the first black president. Check out Newsweek's piece, "The First Woman President?" for the latest iteration, by Martin Linsky, co-founder of Cambridge Leadership Associates and a faculty member at Harvard's Kennedy School of Government. As Linsky notes:

[Obama] is pushing against conventional—and political party nominating convention—wisdom in five important ways, with approaches that are usually thought of as qualities and values that women bring to organizational life: a commitment to inclusiveness in problem solving, deep optimism, modesty about knowing all the answers, the courage to deliver uncomfortable news, not taking on all the work alone, and a willingness to air dirty linen. Hillary Clinton, on the other hand, is taking a more traditional (and male?) authoritarian approach.

...As a woman, Clinton feels constrained to portray herself as tough, competitive, willing to take on the bad guys. She has to be more male than men, in the same way that women are reluctant to leave the office early to pick up their children at day care because they fear they will not be thought of as serious about their careers, while men are applauded for doing so.

Obama can raise possibilities that are off the table for Clinton. She needs to tell us that she can solve our problems. Obama seems comfortable in what we think of as a female role: not overpromising what he can accomplish, and telling us that the work of change is ours as much as it is his.

What do the women's leadership research gurus out there think of the way all this is being framed? (Paging my girls at Catalyst! See also comments by rhetoric scholar J.K. Gayle on previous posts.)

Again, kudos to feministingfor the heads up. Image cred.

Oppression Olympics Fatigue

As feministing notes, the media portrayal of the black man vs. white woman thing is oppression olympics defined. Note the graphic in this article oh-so-subtley titled "Black Man Vs. White Woman" appearing recently in The Boston Globe. Urrgghh.

For a more interesting take on identity politics in this election, check out the brilliant Ann Friedman's latest over at The American Prospect, in which she notes that just because the Democratic candidates are a woman and black man does not mean this is the first election to hinge on candidates' identities. Identity isn't the problem, pretending it doesn't matter is.

(Thanks to Court for the heads up.)

China Re-evaluates Its "Onlies" Policy

So China's vice minister of the National Population and Family Planning Commission has 'fessed up that the nation's one-child policy doesn't seem to be working so well. We are SO not surprised. Interestingly, all this comes as China is trying to soften its human rights image as Beijing prepares to play host to the Olympics in August. As reported in the New York Times ("China to Reconsider One-Child Limit") this morning:

China’s fertility rate is now extremely low, and the population is rapidly aging, especially in urban areas. Experts have warned that China is steadily moving toward a demographic crisis with too many old people in need of expensive services and too few young workers paying taxes to meet those bills.

Good riddance to the policy, I say. Because here's some backstory:

In the 1980s, officials routinely forced women to abort fetuses that would have resulted in above-quota births, and both men and women were often forced to undergo sterilization operations.

Enforcement of the policy has softened markedly in recent years, with most areas relying on fines to ensure compliance. But scandals over forced abortions continue to arise periodically. The restrictions also have deepened a severe imbalance in the ratio of boys to girls in the population because many families have used selective abortions to ensure the birth of a son, the traditional preference.

'Nuf said.

Not that I'm anti-having-an-only-child, of course! I, for one, very likely will, having found love late in life as I have, and I think an only sounds great! And China, of course, is just a very roundabout way to refer to Only Child: Writers on the Singular Joys and Solitary Sorrows of Growing Up Solo the anthology, which is jumping the numbers on Amazon again now that it's out in paperback--whohoo! My coeditor Daphne and I got together yesterday to do a little happy dance. Though she fell asleep in the cafe. She's 7 months pregnant with #2.

Image cred

Notes from a Generational Fence-Sitter

As folks who know me know, I'm endlessly fascinated with the intergenerational divide among women going on around this election. And I've come to feel like those my age occupy an odd place here on the cusp of 40. Many of the polls show the cut-off for Hillary vs. Obama support among women voters as being age 40. We all know that cut-off numbers are often random but convenient divisors, false but convenient truths. Still, I can't help but wonder, does my earlier waffling reflect some kind of generational fence-sitting?

It comes as no surprise that women born at different times in history are going to differ in their attitudes across the board--though the realization does seem to be news for some. In the history of feminism, generational differences has been a central theme for decades. Think back to the 1970s: Betty Friedan (who was by then middle-aged) vs. the radical feminists (who came out of the New Left and antiwar movements and were generally in their 20s). They wanted different things. Some wanted change at City Hall, others rooted their politics in the bedroom. They fought for equality, and fought each other along the way, often destructively. So my question, always, is how do we fight and debate without tearing ourselves apart? How to adamantly disagree and still find the common ground? The questions were relevant in the 1970s, and they're relevant today.

And speaking of, I'm currently gathering data and ammo for the talks I'm giving around the country for Women's History Month and would love to be pointed to any articles you've seen that focus on this latest generational division among women. The way it's all being framed has tremendous consequences, I believe, for the future of women's organizing, for the health of intergenerational relations, and for national politics overall. Thanks in advance for any links. Please feel free to post em here in comments--along with any thoughts of course!--or email me.

P.S. The intergenerational panel I'm traveling with through 2008 may be coming soon to a campus near you! Our March is pretty filled up, but we're booking into the fall, so for more info, please click here.

Image cred

GUEST POST: The Relationship Guide We've Been Waiting For

GUEST BLOGGER: Jacqueline Hudak, M.Ed., Ph.D. is a feminist family therapist who has been working with individuals, couples and families for over twenty years. On a more personal note, Jacqueline is the mother of Lauren, 16, and Vincent, 12 and together with her partner Sarah, they live in Atlantic Highlands NJ. When not thinking about relationships, Jacqueline is a devoted student of yoga, which, as she has said, teaches her to go forward with an open heart, and see the world in different ways. She's a popular teacher, speaker, and family therapy supervisor, and has lectured widely on a variety of topics that impact family life. Jacqueline is an Adjunct Faculty at Drexel University’s Programs in Couple and Family Therapy and is currently at work on two books: a memoir, and a compilation of stories from her years in practice. She is also a "graduate" of my Making It Pop: Translating Your Ideas for Trade seminar, and I'm SO EXCITED to read her books, and to share this guest post from her here! Here's Jacqueline. -GWP

Intimate Justice at Bluestockings NYC!

Intimate justice – doesn’t the sound of it just make you want some?

It was a beautiful scene on the evening of February 13th: a venerable old feminist bookstore, chock full of folks to celebrate the publication of Making Love Playing Power: Men, Women and the Rewards of Intimate Justice by my pal, Ken Dolan-DelVecchio. What an amazing book!

I was admittedly thrilled, but nervous, when upon our arrival at Bluestockings Ken asked me to introduce him. Given my heartfelt respect for this man and the work that we share, I of course, said ‘yes.’ I knew I could find the words, because in my mind, well, perhaps mostly in my heart, I knew how ready we are for a book like this, and how urgently it is needed.

This is because those of us who transgress the lines between doing ‘therapy’ and social justice work try to open our clients and families to new ways of seeing their lives. In my clinical work, I pursue the questions that might help someone see possibility where previously there was none. In this book, Ken provides a clear map of how gender, race, class and sexual orientation influence power in a relationship – and how the imbalance of power is at the root of most conflict. This dynamic is generally not talked about – even by supposed ‘experts’. Ken helps focus our understandings of how we are taught to be male or female, and what cost that exacts from relationships with those we love. This book enacts the revolutionary ideas that men are fully capable of deep intimacy and connection, and women, of empowerment and self-love.

With so many self help books on the market, it is so refreshing to find one that has a chapter entitled “What Patriarchy Teaches Men.” AND it is written by a man. I can only begin to imagine the ways in which sharing this book will enhance my clinical work with couples and families. The dominant psychology of our culture teaches us to look inside the person or relationship for “the problem.” Yet “the problem” is so often outside of the relationship – and the tricky thing is, we don’t talk about it. As a culture, we don’t acknowledge the ways in which the presence or absence of racism, poverty, gender privilege, or heterosexism (to name a few) shape and give meaning to our lives. Instead, we couch the struggles in pseudo-diagnostic terms: “communication problems”, “anger management,” “codependency.” We thus never get to talk about or take action against the structures that support these hierarchies of privilege and oppression within which all families live.

As the mother of an almost teenage boy, I am also deeply concerned about the ways in which he is taught by our culture to be a man. Can he stay the big-hearted, emotional and tender person I have known for 12 years? Must he become indoctrinated into the traditional world of masculinity? I know all of the rhetoric about how men have changed, but has the culture of masculinity? (that’s a whole other blog!) I see the extreme self reliance, the inability to ask for help or be viewed as dependent, in many “younger” men in my practice. I know Ken shares that concern for his son and share that in his dedication: “For your generation, may you know love more than domination and truth more than fear.”

Making Love Playing Power: Men, Women and the Rewards of Intimate Justice is the relationship guide we have been waiting for. Thank you, Ken, for opening so many possibilities to couples and families. Your clarity, dedication and tenderness shine through!

You can reach Jacqueline at jack4fta@comcast.net.

Ha Ha Funny

I don't know about you, but I'm about ready for some election levity. If in need of a laugh, watch below, courtesy of The Onion (and Marco).

Texas Women Torn?

An article in the Houston Chronicle today notes that women in Texas are torn. But I just got off a briefing call with pollster Celinda Lake, who reminded that women in both Texas and Ohio are leaning Hillary.

Celinda also noted the following 5 things about this extraordinary election:

1. The magnitude of the gender gap has reached historic proportions.
2. Turnout models have never been so off.
3. The extent to which the economy has supplanted Iraq as the #1 issue is momentous.
4. Early voting is 4-5 times what it's been in the past.

And my personal favorite:

5. Younger voters are turning out 2,3, and 4 times as much in certain states as in the past.

Working While Knocked Up

So women these days are more likely to work during pregnancy, says the U.S. Census Bureau. As someone who grew up in a time when working while knocked up is so common, I'm tempted to say "duh." But my inner historian knows well, and appreciates, that this hasn't long been the case. And here are the facts, courtesy of the Council on Contemporary Families:

Two-thirds of women who had their first child between 2001 and 2003 worked during their pregnancy compared with just 44 percent who gave birth for the first time between 1961 and 1965, according to a report released today by the U.S. Census Bureau.

The report, Maternity Leave and Employment Patterns: 1961–2003, analyzes trends in women's work experience before their first child, identifies their maternity leave arrangements before and after the birth and examines how rapidly they returned to work.

Women are more likely to work while pregnant than they were in the 1960s, and they are working later into their pregnancies. Eighty percent who worked while pregnant from 2001 to 2003 worked one month or less before their child's birth compared with 35 percent who did so in 1961-1965.

Women are also returning to work more rapidly after having their first child. In the early 1960s, 14 percent of all mothers with newborns were working six months later, increasing to 17 percent within a year. By 2000-2002, the corresponding percentages had risen to 55 percent and 64 percent. (The period of analysis is restricted to women who gave birth by 2002 because some who gave birth in 2003 did not have one full year of employment data by the time of the interview in 2004.)

Other highlights:

-- In 2001-2003, 49 percent of first-time mothers who worked during pregnancy used paid leave before or after their child's birth, while 39 percent used unpaid leave. Twenty-five percent quit their jobs: 17 percent while they were pregnant and another 8 percent by 12 weeks after the child's birth.

-- Forty-three percent of women in 2001-2003 used paid leave after their child's birth compared with 22 percent before their child's birth.

-- Sixty percent of mothers with a bachelor's degree or more received paid leave benefits compared with 39 percent of mothers with a high school diploma and 22 percent of those who had less than a high school education.

-- Eighty-three percent of mothers who worked during pregnancy and returned to work within a year of their child's birth returned to the same employer. Seven in 10 of these women returned to jobs at the same pay, skill level and hours worked per week.

Hmmm. Very interesting.

INTRODUCING: Female Sports Fans Blog

Hey you femalesportsfans, check it out!

(Welcome new blogger, and thanks to Daph for the heads up)

On the Importance of Embracing Controversy

Personal hero Gloria Feldt--who is also on the Board of the Women's Media Center, where I'm part of that first class of Progressive Women's Voices--is about to hit #11 on the New York Times Bestseller list with her new book with Kathleen Turner, called Send Yourself Roses.

I met Kathleen at their book party earlier this week and was appropriately star struck.

But what I want to share via Gloria this morning is something she shared with us at PVW a few weeks ago. She was asked about the lessons she learned leading a social movement where she worked a great deal with the media and messages as vehicles of social change. And she told us about the importance of embracing controversy--something I'm still learning. I seem to keep playing it safe when reporters contact me to talk about intergenerational divide among women around the election. I'm working on how to respond without fueling a notion of "catfight." Still working on it. Meanwhile, Gloria's general comments to us are now posted on her blog, here.

In a nutshell, the 6 C's of Embracing Controversy:

Controversy is the Courage to risk putting your Convictions out there to the world, using the controversy strategically, because controversy is a Clarifier—it gets people’s attention so you can use your platform to present your Case at a time when people are paying attention, and therefore controversy is a Change agent—because to make change you have to make people think differently, learn new things, and clarify their values.

May we all learn to follow Gloria's example, I say. The woman knows from whence she speaks.

EVENT: Girls Write Now Day

Personally, I think we should have Girls Write Now Month! But I'll settle for a day.

To commemorate International Women's Day, GWN is hosting several fantastic readings and, in collaboration with SIC (Smart Is Cool) Movement, a fashion show, all at the New School next Saturday, March 8 (5-7pm). It's a day to encourage girls of all ages everywhere in the world to put pen to paper and explore the beauty and power of their unique, creative voices. And it's a day to celebrate girls, girl writers, and overall girl awesomeness.

For more information, please contact nikki@girlswritenow.org.

Only Child Reborn Today in Paperback!

Only Child: Writers on the Singular Joys and Solitary Sorrows of Growing Up Solo is unleashed into the world again today, in paperback this time. My coeditor Daphne Uviller and I are spreading word through parenting blogs. (If you write for one or are a journalist interested in a review copy, please write CrownMarketing@randomhouse.com, with ONLY CHILD in the subject line.)

On Sunday, right smack in the middle of the Oscars, at 9pm, there was a one-hour show on Only Child on WKCR, 89.9FM. It will soon be available for download from the WKCR website. It's a This-American-Life style arts show called Studio A, and the host is Michelle Legro. The show includes a long interview with us (in which a preggers-again Daphne tells why she’s having number 2 and I ‘fess up to my newfound embrace of a hoped-for only), a reading from the book, some interviews with oc experts, and some readings by other onlies.

And on April 7, 2008 Daph and I will be teaching a Mediabistro intensive on putting together anthologies, here in NYC. Come one, come all! You'll learn about the process, from soup to nuts: how to write a proposal, find contributors, manage and edit submissions, work with purchasing editors, make the best use of your in-house publicist, and learn how to self-publicize (yep, no getting around that, case in point). You'll leave with a timeline in hand detailing the process by which you could reasonably expect to complete a salable anthology. Mediabistro also has a nice lil article on anthology making, by one of my fave ladies Rachel Kramer Bussel, available on their site.

Doing this anthology with Daph changed my life, for reals. For one, it launched me into the book publishing world. Writing my essay for it helped me come to terms with my own experience of being an only child who got divorced. But more than all that, it gave me a taste of writing collaboration at its best. For that, I am forever grateful to our amazing contributors, my agent Tracy Brown, and to Daph.

Why I Heart Geena Davis

In the latest Women's Media Center Exclusive, Sara Voorhees reports on the findings of the Geena Davis Institute on Gender and Children in the Media (GDIDM). Here's the summary:

"For actress Geena Davis, who had galvanized women with movies such as Thelma and Louise and A League of Their Own, and her recent television role as the first female president of the United States (Commander in Chief), 'where are the girls?' was a question that needed to be answered. She started her own non-profit, and with the help of USC Annenberg School of Journalism professor Stacy Smith, Davis began research to assess portrayals of males and females in children's media. On January 30 and 31, 2008, at the University of Southern California, under the auspices of GDIDM, she presented the findings at a forum for studio heads, writers, educators and students."

Findings available here.

EVENT: PShift

I recently learned about this new(ish) NYC feminist network called Paradigm Shift. They do meet-ups, open mics, and more. And they're throwing a party to celebrate women here in NYC on March 1 from 6:30pm to 3:00am (with a drumming circle at 5:30pm) at Cattyshack Brooklyn. For more info about the event and the org, check out the website.

GUEST POST: The 411 on Health Care and Inequality

Rebecca London, Ph.D., is Director of Research at Stanford University’s John W. Gardner Center for Youth and Their Communities. Rebecca lives on California’s central coast with her husband and two school-age daughters. She's frequently quoted in the press as an expert on poverty, youth, and working motherhood. Here she is! -GWP

The New York Times reported last Monday that people who lack health insurance tend to receive cancer diagnoses later in the stages of their illness, making treatment more costly and survival less likely ("Study Finds Cancer Diagnosis Linked to Insurance"). This finding, though horrific, is fairly predictable given previous research on health insurance coverage. Numerous studies have shown that lack of health insurance can be detrimental because uninsured patients tend to not receive regular or preventive care, their undiagnosed or under-medicated conditions thrive in the absence of such care, and when medical crisis escalates, they find their way into the emergency room and subject to exorbitant medical bills.

What is unusual – indeed frightening – about the study reported in the Times is that the findings apply not only to those with no insurance, but also to those who are insured by Medicaid, the health insurance program for poor adults and children. Medicaid should work like private health insurance, offering its subscribers access to preventive and acute-need health care on a timely and low-cost basis. However, it is well known that Medicaid reimbursement rates to doctors are lower than reimbursements from private insurers, and come with a tremendous amount of bureaucratic paperwork. Many medical professionals opt to not provide treatment to those covered by the program simply because it is not cost effective to do so.

The result: expanding inequality in access to health care with truly dire health consequences.

In this election year, any politician who tells us that universal health care is not needed to fix the U.S. health care crisis is avoiding a painful truth. Expanding Medicaid is not an option if we want to ensure health care access to everyone. We need to look back to the dark days of Hillary’s universal health care plan failure and critically analyze what happened with it in order to create a fresh version that will be palatable to policymakers and the public. Maybe a decade later, we’re ready to make a critical move.

Anthology CFP

This just came my way -- though the deadline for submissions is March 1, so if you're interested, better hop to (or ask for an extension):

* Thinking of joining a nunnery?
* Feeling asexual and just want to cuddle?
* Swinging and loving it?

We want to see/hear/read your stories! Audio stories are great, too. CDs may accompany the anthology.

SEND YOUR CREATIONS TO THE FORTHCOMING ANTHOLOGY:

"Desire: A Girl's Guide to Dreaming - Queer Women of Color Writing Critically on the Erotic" (working title)

We invite people to share their experiences and thoughts on sex, lust, love, relationship, desire, the erotic, being stone, being poly. How do you envision, enact, do sex? And not. This anthology is about opening up language, story, healing.

Is it okay to ask your queer of color fam to cuddle, without it being sexual? What does it mean to touch and connect with people without wanting sex, without it being sexual? What is erotic? How is it lived by queer women of color? If people are looking for liberation in their bodies, in their shared connection with people, what does that look like? What does queer sex feel like, taste like, dream like? What if you could dream your way out of survivor, into thriving, into living and creating intentional relationships that heal, rather than sting, love and push through all the bifurcations of our lived lives. How do you touch your way out of colonization, how do touching and connection become a way of resisting colonization and objectification, and healing from rape, assault, sexual abuse, physical abuse? What language is used? What words are created? When we are in desire, the articulation of the possible, how do we free ourselves, how are we already free where we see traps? Where are you, finally, free? In desire, are you free?

A sense of humor is a must in all relationships; we seek levity and gravity, fun, light energy that is also deep, connected, and profound. Funny stories, essays, and work with a twist all welcome. Send beautiful words, art, funny anecdotes, poetry, images, stills of performances to desireanthology@yahoo.com. The deadline for sending work is 1 March 2008. If you desire a land address for mailing work, contact us at the above e-mail address.

We look forward to hearing from you,
Pak Soo Na and Sherisse Alvarez

Tina Fey for Hillary

This kills.

Favorite quotes: "She's a bitch. I'm a bitch. Get used to it." "Bitches get stuff done." "Bitch is the new black!" (You gotta see it in context to not be offended. I personally found it v. funny!)

Is Obama Leading Like a Woman?

Ellen Goodman had an interesting column last Friday ("The Female Style -- Modeled By a Man") in which she notes that Hillary Clinton has become "the tough guy in the race" and Barack Obama "the Oprah candidate."

As Goodman explains, "He was the quality circle man, the uniter-not-divider, the person who believes we can talk to anyone, even our enemies. He finely honed a language usually associated with women's voices." She quotes political science professor Kathleen Dolan, who sees Obama as "the embodiment of the gentle, collaborative style without threatening his masculine side." Dolan adds, "He's being more feminine than she can be. She is in a much tighter box."

Goodman offers a brief history of leadership studies and concludes with a provocative question: "So, has the women's movement made life easier? For another man?"

I spoke to Goodman for her piece but she didn't end up quoting me. I wish I could have referred her to both Renee Cramer and J.K. Gayle, who were having a similar conversation here on GWP, while I was off feeding sheep!

In his astute response to Renee's post, J.K. Gayle shares some great links, which I wanted to share with everyone here. Comments J.K.:

Karlyn Kohrs Campbell, the world’s greatest scholar on womanly discourse and on presidential rhetoric, has conceded (to some of us at a conference recently) that Barack Obama is using feminist rhetoric. Kohrs Campbell is the one who wrote that famous “Hating Hillary” article a while back, in which she looked at the rhetorics of hate around Clinton. (I asked if she thought Toni Morrison, who endorses Obama, could fairly call him, if elected, “our first woman president.” Kohrs Campbell, who likes the idea of a true woman president sooner rather than later, replies: “yes, you could call him a ‘womanly’ presidential candidate.”)

In a related post, Hugo Schwyzer offers "A few notes on feminism, symbols, and youthful Obamophilia."

(Ellen, ask me again, and I will refer you to GWP readers!)

GWP Institute: Find Your Subject, Find Your Voice

I'm excited to share that in April, I'll be teaming up with journalist Alissa Quart (author of Branded: The Buying and Selling of Teenagers and Hothouse Kids: The Dilemma of the Gifted Child) for a two-session on-site intensive on personal writing (essay writing, blogging, and more!) -- offered through the Woodhull Institute for Ethical Leadership.

FINDING YOUR SUBJECT, FINDING YOUR VOICE: A Seminar in Personal Nonfiction

When: Sunday, April 13 at 11 am - 3pm, April 17 at 6 pm - 9 pm.
Where: New York City
To see more details and RSVP, click here, call 6464350837, or email ldavis@woodhull.org.

And here's our course description:

So many of us want to put our ideas or personal experiences down on paper, but don’t know how to find our medium or shape our raw material into stories. In two intensive sessions, we will seek to find the topic, style and genre for that which we most wish to express. We will start by asking ourselves questions about what we have experienced in our lives. What’s notable about us and what are we experts in? What are our motives for writing? What specific goal are we hoping to achieve by writing about our lives? After taking a hard look at our interests, work and life experiences, we will figure out whether they will intersect with an audience, what sort of audience, and how to position our ideas and ourselves in order to reach that audience. With this accomplished, we will build out our best article, essay, blog, or book ideas. By the end of the class, each student will have either a story pitch, an outline for a short article or an oped, a start on a personal essay, or an idea for a book or a blog. These written frames will serve as the culmination of our in-class exercises, group conversations, and at-home writing in between the two sessions.

In order to get a better sense of voice, story and topic in non-fiction, we will read a selection of modern essay writers (among them Joan Didion’s Goodbye To All That, a selection from Alexandra Fuller’s Don’t Let’s Go To The Dogs Tonight, a Mary McCarthy personal essay etcetera). In order to get a better sense of blog personae, content, and voice, we will look together at range of blogs with strong personal voices and discuss. For those who decide to create their own blogs as a means of personal expression, we will create them on-site, along with names and domains, learning about blog style, purpose, and community along the way. We will discuss how blog writing differs and overlaps with more traditional forms of personal writing as well.